I've got my fist, I've got my plan...

A picture that I took from the show in Inglewood.

September 6th 2008
Our first NIN show.

Seriously, this NIN show in Portland is ging to be EPIC. Without question.

We've plotted something amazing to get our asses noticed and remembered. Turns out Riot will be able to make it. Also getting to meet some new friends there that I've been talking to through the internet. We'll be getting there around 5 am. I can't wait. I'm more excited than ever.


In other news, I've caught up on all my work in my other classes. Things really seem to be looking up. Things are finally going in the direction I want them to, and it feels good.

I have nothing to say, and I'm saying it.

My life feels like a mess. It's time to clean up. Hopefully I get everything I want to get done this weekend. It seems to have no control over my life anymore, and it's driving me absolutely insane. But, I'll fix that. I always do. It's time to change.



In other news:
Mom's breast cancer test came back 'inconclusive'. She has to go in for another biopsy.

It seems she's becoming more of a mother now. It feels pretty nice. But my dad may have liver cancer, so we'll see if that'll turn him into a better dad? Don't get me wrong, I don't like that my parents may both have cancer. I just like that my mother and I are actually getting along, and it feels like she's trying harder to be a good mother.
We'll see how all this plays out.

Everyone dies eventually. Just because they're more aware of it now, shouldn't change anything, except their want to get more out of life. So no one should be sad. We should all just realize life could be shorter than we think, so we really do need to take advantage of our time, rather than always worrying about when it's going to end.



Nine Inch Nails will be in Portland in a couple weeks, and I must say, I'm fucking ready. I need this NIN fix to get me back on track. I just miss the whole environment of it all. I miss the people, and the feeling of reaching that goal of getting to the front, and hopefully getting to chat with the guys. I like having an achievable goal to reach for. I'm thinking about bribing Rob with coffee over Twinkle so they'll let us inside early, and out of the cold. Haha. Cause dude, the wait will be FREEZING. And I'll do whatever it takes to avoid it, even if it's really dumb. Haha.

It seems like all the Portlanders are ready to prove that we aren't as dull a crowd as people think we are. Everyone is so excited and ready to rock the fuck out. Good for them.


Turns out my mother won't be taking us to Vegas, because she'll be getting another biospy that week, and she'll be laying around for a few days. Last time every time she stood up, she stared bleeding. So that's definitely not going to happen.

That sucks, I REALLLLLY wanted to go to Vegas.
: [

Also, Carol took us to 2 places already. It'd be nice for my mother to take us somewhere for a change.


I think I'm going to re-do everything now. From my layout here, to my room. Things need to change, I feel like everything remains the same ALL the time, and it's driving me crazy. We'll see how far I get with all that.

3 more weeks in this term, and I'm so ready for another vacation.

How much for one night?

So, I'm sitting here. Listening to Portishead on vinyl. I'm not sure why, but the sound of vinyl sounds and feels so much better to me than digital. Cleaner somehow. I also love that I'm not able to fast forward or skip anything. I listen to the album the whole way though.


Anyway.. I've been thinking a lot about photography lately for some reason.

When I was pretty young, I remember wanting to be a singer. But when I was old enough to realize that you can just have a career like that because you want it, I decided I'd better look for something else. Something achievable. I'd always done a little photography just for the fun of doing it. Got my first digital camera in 6th grade. It was more of a hobby than anything else.

Then my parents caught eye of what I'd been doing. Apparently I had an eye for this kind of stuff? I realized, 'Okay, I could make money off of this, right? Well then this is what I want to do with my life.' So I went after it. I put together a portfolio, and applied to Arts and Communication Magnet Academy [ACMA]. I look back at the photos now, and they were weak, and there was almost no emotion or story behind anything. Just pictures of nothing important. I also didn't have the ability to edit my photos, so they felt plain.


But the school loved them, and I was accepted into ACMA, but I ended up turning them down. I didn't see what I'd done, as anything too good, and I questioned whether I could make a career out of it. I didn't want to go after something I wouldn't end up being able to get in the end, even after all the work I'd put in. I had this mindset that you can't just do what you love to make a living. And if you want to try, you most likely won't succeed. You have to be extremely exceptional at it to get it. Which I didn't feel I was.


[I think I've definitely improved at least a little.]



So I was left at a point were I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. And it drove me mad. I still desperately wanted a career in music, but knew I couldn't have it. Music had always been everything to me, and saved me more times than I could possibly count. I soon began not caring about whether I could make it or not. I just wanted it.

So, 7th grade, I pulled my old keyboard out of storage. A Christmas present from '97. Sure it was old, but it worked just fine.

Not much happened at first, but in 8th grade, I'd made some friends with the same love for music as me, and people who could help me create it. After that, making music felt like a drug to me. It got me through everything, sometimes more than anyone else's music could. I was able to get any emotions out in writing and in melody. It felt incredible. I haven't felt that since the end of my freshman year of high school. Since I couldn't get my emotions out in music, I turned to photography. I seem to be stuck in this cycle.

I have been looking into Rob Sheridan's photography, just thinking how the hell he got so god damn lucky. At 19, he was hired on the spot as just a fan, and has been working for Trent ever since. Doing what he's loves. And living a pretty nice life. [From what I hear at least.]


You know, all this stuff is just too god damn complicated.
Music - Can't get it. Just want it.
Photography - Can't get it. Just a hobby.

I think I'll just be a roadie, and see where it takes me.


Don't get me wrong. Music is what I'm after. I'm just wondering if I could make anything off of photography. Once I move to LA with Tessa, maybe I can make money off of live band photography. Doesn't matter who. Just surround myself with the music and environment, then any other time I'm not working, I could just work on my music.


Okay, now it just sounds like I'm after money. No, it's not that. I just want to know I could actually live my life doing something I want to do. And to actually live, you have to have money. Oh god, that's actually pretty sad. But, a salary is necessary.


Ugh, dude, do I have a future, or am I just kidding myself?



My brain is tired. How bout an update on my life, and not my mind.

Since New Orleans, I've been completely brain dead. [Oh wait, am I talking about my mind again?] Missing homework assignments. And even missing classes, or just leaving early. I have had this essay due for about 2 weeks now, and I'm yet to do it. I just can't.

For some reason, I can't not write an essay on politics. Sure, I can talk about it plenty, but when it comes to writing it down in a specific format and what-not, it freaks me out, and I loose all train of thought. I can't fucking do it. I hope this doesn't cost me my credits. I just HAVE to do it this weekend. [Which I probably won't, unfortunately.] Along with my History of Rock Music homework.



Ughh, so tedious.



Math is easy. I'm always on top of that -no problem. Just everything else is getting to me. Shit, I can't fall behind.






I'm so happy it's Friday.








OH yeah! The reason for the title?

There's a story. Get ready.


So, Tessa and I have to take the public bus home from PCC everyday. We'd left class early, so we had no idea when the next bus was coming. So we were waiting for a loooong ass time at the bus stop on the corner. After maybe 45 minutes of waiting, this Asian woman comes up to us, and says, 'How much for one night?' in this thick accent. At first, I thought she was making a joke.
I said 'What?', and expected her to laugh and walk away. But instead she just repeated herself.

I wasn't sure if she was actually asking what I thought she was asking. After a long confusing paragraph from this woman about her husband, I look at Tessa with the most confused look on my face. Tessa was just playing with her iPhone.

The woman keeps asking, and Tessa tells her that we're just waiting for the bus. The woman points and tells us that the bus stop is 'over there'. Yeah, you caught us. We're waiting at a corner 10 feet away from a bus stop, so we must be hookers.

The woman tells us that she wanted to know more about 'what we do'. I told her we don't do anything, so she just says 'Oh, okay. You were on the corner so I just assumed.' Then she just casually walks away, as if what she did was completely normal.


I'm sure this is a lot funnier if you were actually there, but it's fucking priceless. We laughed so hard, for so long. I mean, it's not like we LOOKED like hookers or anything. Unless the new hooker sheik is combat boots, jeans and leather jackets. Also, mid-day, rainy cold weather, dressed 'rebellious', minding our own business? What the fuck was that all about? And to make it more ghetto, we're standing in front of a Popeyes?
Wowww.
That's wonderful. So, we have a corner now.








I think I'll bake some brownies, and learn some piano covers. Avoid my homework a little longer. Hopefully my father will keep his promise [same one he keeps changing the date on], and take me to Guitar Center tomorrow to buy me a new mic cable. And I want to talk him into letting me look at the bass guitars.

Okay, well specifically that one I've had my eye on for the past 4 or 5 months. The Dean Evo XM. I just want to see if it's as nice as I hear it is.


Then, I want a tambourine.

:D


Haha I have no idea what my obsession is with them lately. I think it's because I've been playing Tap Tap NIN so much, and the tambourine has become one of my favorite parts in a few songs. Then there's always the 'With_Teeth' album. Trent uses it a lot, and it just makes the songs so catchy. Haha, I don't know, I'm kind of a loser. But let me tell you that I don't want it because Trent plays it. [If that were my goal, I'd have to get about a million other instruments that I can't play.] I just like it, that's all.


Riot called me last night during the Atlantic City show. I got to hear The Collector, and Reptile. With Peter Murphy? Haha oh my god, totally freaked me out. I love that girl. I'm so glad I kind of got to be a part of that. Considering, apparently it's been the best show so far. That set list? Dude, I reallllly hope that we're that lucky in Portland, and the guys do something a little special for us.

I hate how Portland has this awful reputation of having bad crowds. Ones who barely move at all. That better not happen at this show. We're rocking the fuck out. I'm bringing my younger brother to his first NIN show. And I've already told him that we'll be at the rail, and if he's one of the people who doesn't even move, I'll kick him in the balls, and force him out. That's just wasted space for people who want to be there. It's unfair to everyone else behind you.

Well, Portland promises to be amazing anyway. We gave Riot Tessa's extra pre-sale ticket, and I've talked Rev into coming to this show, since I missed him in Inglewood, because he was late. Should be a party. It's going to be a lonnnng cold wait. Watch, it will probably snow. Haha, ohh Portland.

I hope we get to run into Robin again. Then maybe meet Trent and the rest of the guys. Tess says that we'll know what hotel they're staying at, but I don't see us visiting. Haha, we're not the creeper/stalker type. And plus, that'd be just a little weird.

The day after the show is the beginning of finals week. I may have talked our writing teacher into coming to the show. Even though that's crunch time for him. Grading and finals and all. But I don't know, he seems to love Trent, and we've successfully made him jealous with our Voodoo experience.



I think I'll go to bed actually. I've been so stressed and -oh, techno. [Music's on shuffle.] Okay, well good techno is sounding pretty amazing right now. So maybe a snack, then bed once this song is over. Or this and a few others.

Thanks to Eric for good techno:
'My Body feat Mia J' - Benny Benassi








Okay, fuck.
I really need to get my act together.

Music music music.

You know, I'm kind of getting the hang of this blog thing. I think that I'm not just going to talk about my NIN experiences and stuff. I think I'll keep a type of journal. It helps to get a lot off my mind.

I'm actually trying to clean my room right now. But the music playing is distracting me. My parents left for Vegas this morning for my mom's birthday. My 14 year old brother, Luke, and I have the house to ourselves till Sunday. I checked my PCC mail today. Saw an announcement that told me that campus would be closed today. Okay, cool, more time to work.

I'm really enjoying the [early] college life. So much more laid back, and I don't feel like I'm being babysat. It is my responsibility -finally- to control my own life.

I'm being a bad sister and letting my brother stay home from school. I think I'll call the school and tell them he's home sick, then maybe pick up his homework once I get dressed.

I'm currently just sitting at my computer in a mans dress shirt and a pair of red Dr. Martens. Men's clothes feel so much more comfortable than my own. I have no idea why I'm wearing these shoes though.


I'm listening to NIN's 'Still' album, and it's really making me miss New Orleans. I just can't get over that place. It was so beautiful, and the whole environment was great. Music was everywhere, and the people were so cool. So now I'm debating with myself. After I graduate, should Tessa and I move to LA like we had originally planned? Or should we move to New Orleans? It's actually tearing me apart. I'm looking for a career in LA. We could have chances to get ourselves out there, and get our music noticed in a place like Los Angeles. But New Orleans just feels right. What's a girl to do? Do we have more of a future in LA? I need to talk to Tessa about this.


The music is also on my mind. We need to really start buckling down, and working on our music. Tessa just got a beautiful black Dean guitar, that should arrive in the mail soon. Then she'll learn how to play it. The brother of a friend of mine sent me a message, and told me that if we needed it, he would be more than happy to do some backup guitar. We may have to take advantage of it. Tessa also got us Logic Studio, which should help us out a lot. Eric is actually 'back' in Portland, and wants to work on some music with us. He makes techno, but he's so talented when it comes to creating music on computers. I think we'll get together with him soon, and goof off with some music. Don't need to make it for the band, just need to make it for the hell of it. It's been so long since I've been able to create music with friends. I've hit a mad writers block. But I think it's actually just my lack of having someone to bounce ideas off of. I guess for now, I'll just do some covers.


Why is it that I'm always nagging people about music? I think I just miss creating it. We've got the ability. We've got the opportunities. And we've got the right equipment. Now we just need to go for it. My music had always been my way of expressing how I felt. Now that I've stopped writing, I feel like it's still all bottled up inside me, eating me alive.


I've turned on the keyboard. My room will have to wait.

NOLA -The Voodoo Experience

I've known for quite some time that Myspace is just plain stupid. And to write a blog on it, is complicated and flawed. I think it's time to get a real place to talk to myself. Why not?

I decided that since I would loveeee to share how incredible my weekend was with everyone, that I should just write one long blog about it. That way, I don't have to tell the same stories to everyone over and over again. [Not like I don't like talking about it. Bring it up with me, and I guarantee a long long conversation about how great this all is.]



I went to my second NIN show this past weekend, in New Orleans, at the Voodoo Festival. It was probably the best weekend of my life to date.



VOODOO DAY 0:
New Orleans
Riot's Blog

My friend Tessa and I got on a plane at 6 am to fly to Chicago, then to a connecting flight to New Orleans.
We got to see the sunrise from the plane, and it was probably one of the most amazing things I've seen in a long time. Too bad I didn't get a photo that could actually do it justice.



As tired as we were from being too excited and unable to sleep the night before our early 6 am flight, we couldn't sleep on the plane either. A long long flight, and nothing to do but think about the weekend to come. I'd occasionally catch a glance of Tessa's 'Concert Face'. She couldn't contain her excitement. She basically looked like she was trying not to scream, but with a huge smile on her face.
I'm beginning to get sick of flying. Then again, they're always taking me to get my next NIN fix. So I don't hate them too much

I texted my friend 'Riot' as soon as we got off the plane. She was going to arrive in NOLA a few hours after us. I couldn't wait to see her again.




We arrive, and it is humid, and rainy. We get in a cab, and head to the hotel. The W. Nicest hotel I think I've ever stayed in. We have Carol -Tessa's mom, and my second mother-, and Molly -a friend of theirs, that grants all of our wishes- to thank for that. Tessa and I get to our room, and immediately start getting ready to see Riot, so she could take us out to see where Trent Reznor used to live, and where Nothing Studios used to be.



We finally head back down to the lobby to meet up with Riot, and join in a big group hug, then head out. We catch a cab, and ask to be taken to Trent's old house. We giggle while she says the adress, cause we feel pretty stupid. We laugh and talk obnoxiously the entire way.

I had no idea what we were looking for. Next thing I know, Riot freaks out and grabs my arm.
'THAT WAS IT.' she said in a frantic whisper. We get out, and just stare for a bit. Then she took pictures. Lots and lots of pictures.

^ All of us. ^

^ Riot's attempt at getting a picture of us. ^

We were a tad bit loud, and annoying with the camera flashes going off. [Whoops.] But, we were so excited. I realize it was a stupid thing to do, to go to Trent Reznor's old house, but we're always playing the 'cool, non-freak fan' role, and we decided we were aloud at least one fangirl moment. A chance to be total losers.
Plus, the house was really really pretty.


We head over to Magazine street towards Nothing. The walk seemed to take forever, but we had Riot's 'NIN vet' stories to keep us entertained. Talking about when she met the band, and her NIN experiences. We be mad jealous of what she's done and seen. She tells us how she has no desire to really meet the band again. They scare the shit out of her apparently. But she did say that she would do whatever she can to get us to meet them. Especially this weekend.

We finally see the studio, and nearly tear up. So much happened here. A true fan moment. It's just crazy to think about the history that's behind this place. I'd give anything to get a chance to record an album here. But it looks as though it will never happen. At least we got a chance to see it.




Riot hangs a resistance flag on the door. That girl is so paranoid, and she feels so stupid putting it up, in fear of what Trent will think. Assuing he'll get angry and know it was her. Haha, what a silly girl.




We snap a few more pictures, and head back to the hotel. One of the oddest men walked up to us talking about god knows what, while we waited for the cab. I understood very little of what he was saying. He was a bit on the crazy side, but definitely made the night more interesting.

We get back to the hotel, and chill for a bit. Showing Riot what we might wear for the shows, and the pictures we had on my iPod Touch and Tessa's iPhone. She seemed verrrrry amazed.


We rough house a little, and I get shoved behind the bed. Riot seems to think we are hillarious and what-not, so she feels it necessary to take pictures of my ass pinned between a bed and a wall.

We discussed the plan for the next day, and Riot left. After that, we had no idea what to do, so we went to bed.





VOODOO DAY 1:
First official day of Voodoo
Riot's Blog



We got up fairly early, and met Riot in the lobby. She was wearing the amazing new NIN dress the she created. A beautiful white fluffy dress with a ghosts theme. Fancy hair and a mask. All glittery. She is truly one of the most talented people I know.



We found a cab, and headed over City Park where Voodoo was. It's a good thing we didn't walk like we had originally planned.
As soon as we saw the big Voodoo sign, it hit us. We were there. Got our bracelets, and headed in. We bearly make it though the front, and Riot is immediately asked by someone to have a picture taken with her.



Tessa and I back up as she poses. Next thing we know, there are like 8 photographers surrounding her, taking her picture. It was fucking hilarious. One woman takes a picture of Tessa and I. [I need to find all these pictures] We walk through the park, and plot out a little more about how the day of the NIN show will work. "Make it through the entrance, and BOOK IT to the Voodoo stage."

Attacked by a news woman, and Riot gets interviewed. Next, us. Haha, weird. But kind of cool.

What the fuck is up with my face?

We continue looking though the park.

Yes, we're cool enough to run though bubbles and brave enough to take pictures with vicious tigers.

We wandered till about 1, then headed out to look for coffee. Oh Riot, the coffee whore. After being lied to from about 3 people about the location of a coffee shop, we stop at subway, and get some water. We headed back to the park, and told Riot how we look like her entourage. Two shorter girls dressed in all black, next to her in this big fancy princess dress, traveling on either side of her. She denies it and thinks we're crazy.


We got back into the park, and a group of guys compliments Riot on her dress. Then comments about how she's been traveling around all day with her entourage. Hahah! WE TOLD YOU! She doesn't get it. She calls us her heroes for some unknown reason, even though we've done nothing special. She's so fucking crazy.



We headed back to the Voodoo stage, to wait for TV On The Radio. We see Wycleaf Jean while we're waiting. Which we actually ended up all loving. He was fun to watch, and seemed pretty damn intelligent (at least compared to other artists there). Plus, he made a girl with harry armpits and a hoola hoop come up from the crowd, and hoola hoop for everyone. Kind of hilarious.

Through out the show, we all felt rather uncomfortable. People loved Riot's outfit so much, that they loved to sneak pictures of her. I was standing next to her, so I was right in the line of fire. Tessa next to me, so you could most likely see her too. A little weird. But whatever.




While waiting for TVOTR, Tessa checked nin.com for any new updates. Turns out there was one. Trent talking about how us 'our-of-towners' should head over to the 'House of Shock'. Okay! We'll do it right after TVOTR. Sounded like fun.


TV On The Radio was way better than I ever could have hoped. Seemed like us 3 were the only ones rocking the fuck out, and cheering. Oh well, we were enjoying ourselves. And it was great.

From TheTenthRitual.com

Once it was over, we immediately headed out to get a cab. None of us had any idea where we were going. We finally found the address after a ton of phone calls, and we headed over.

The area looks sketchy. 'Trent, what are you getting us into?' we say. $30 later, we finally arrive. We pass up the VIP pass, cause we didn't think it would matter. We were all hungry and exhausted from a long couple of days, and kind of just wanted to get it over with.



Eventually, we decide to leave. It would take 2 more hours to get thorough, and we had to get up early , to get our spot in line for NIN the next morning. Get in the cab around 9:11. Head back to the hotel, leave Riot, and order room service. Bed.






VOODOO DAY 2:
Nine Inch Nails
Riot's Blog


Tessa and I got up around 7:30. Planned on meeting Riot at the festival around 9. On our way I get a call from Riot saying she was getting coffee, and she wanted me to find her friend Erin. Alright. We get there and I was too shy to say anything. That's something I have to stop doing. Riot arrives, and gets mad at me for not saying anything. Aweh, haha, I didn't mean to make her mad.



She introduces us. Erin shows us the sign for the show. 'NOLA Welcomes Home NIN'.
Perfect.

We hear NIN soundcheck. '1,000,000' playing in the distance.

We finally get to move up to get in. Riot and I get our bags checked. Had to empty EVERYTHING out. Then they made me throw the chain on my pants away. I wasn't too thrilled about that.


I get to the line, and only see Riot. Apparently the lady accidentally let a few people through by accident. Good, Tessa probably got our spot. But we're still gonna run like hell.



I was only able to run about half way. Haha, I'm such an our of shape loser. How pathetic. None the less, we got the exact spots we wanted. Now, we wait. It's 10 am, and NIN gets on around 10 pm. We had a long day ahead of us.


A creepy roadie under the stage kept looking over and smiling at us. Tried talking, but I could barely hear him over the music playing. 'The Perfect Drug' shows up on the big screen. Tessa screams, people stare. Haha, NIN fans are cool people. Especially Tessa.I watch the video, and hear Tessa say her name. The roadie had come over to say hi. He shakes her hand. 'Beautiful, gorgeous' he says. Haha Okayyyy.

Not only is she hot, but she had super cleavage.
BONUS!


We sit down. It was sunny, and hot. Everything we'd expected. Tons of NIN fans start showing up.

Oh look, my eye.

Riot goes and gets us some food and water, because we refused to move from the our spot. It was the perfect spot, and we would rather starve than give it up.

Oh Riot and those photographers.

Bands played on and off. A few really good, and few really bad.

We check nin.com


Picture was posted last night at 9:08. They were AT The House of Shock, at the SAME FUCKING TIME as us. We left 2 fucking minutes after that was posted. Had we gotten VIP, or at least stayed. We would have met them. FUCKDAMNIT. That blows. Yeah, we were a little fucking angry.

After Innerpartysystem, the same roadie that had been staring at our spot all day, told a security guard to give the drum stick to one of us. I reached out and grabbed it. After debating, I gave it to Tessa.

Us with Riot - Our NIN Mommy

Then he walked by a little later, and handed Tessa their guitar pick. Lil' Wayne was to play next. We were actually a bit excited for it...

Before the show starts, we see a couple of shitfaced girls in green paint, get pulled out of the crowd. We laugh at them. Next thing we know though, one of those girls was right behind us. How the hell she got there, I have no idea. But she looked like she was about ready to vomit. Had us all scared that she would on us, and we would have to leave our spots. The spots that we had kept so safe all day. Not.Going.To.Happen. We yell at the guards to take her out. They refused to. They preferred to laugh at us. They said they couldn't unless she needed out. Well, we needed her out. She started groping the girl behind us. Leaning on her and and just being obnoxious. She gets mad and tells the drunk girl to back off. The drunk girl attempts to say 'bitch please'.

All we can do is laugh at this girl. She is completely plastered, and trying to text and just stay standing up. We knew that as soon as Lil' Wayne came out, the crowd was going to push to the front, and it would squeeze her, and she would projectile vomit over all of us. No. Not.going.to.happen. She continues to sexually harass everyone around her. Puts her hand down the girls plants.

We tell secutity to take her out. They still refused to. We asked if it was a guy, if they'd take them out. They said 'yeah'. Well, that's sexist.

Lil' Wayne finally comes on, and it wasn't very exciting at all really.



I expected way more. But we still cheered, even with the lack of good bass to rock out to.

Near the end of the first song, a fight breaks out between the girl behind us, and the drunk girl. Drunk girl punched her in the face. Security come over and tells us to enjoy the show. THEY JUST DON'T FUCKING GET IT. They FINALLY take her out after a ton of arguing.

Lil' Wayne.
Boring.
Uneventful.
And long.


Finally over, and we continue to wait. One more band, and we finally get our band. YES.


After standing and walking for nearly 3 days straight without resting, we were tired. The crowd was starting to get more crammed, so there wasnt much room to sit. So I sit down, and let Tessa sat on my lap. Riot thinks we're adorable somehow. Even though we kind of look ill in this picture.




Mars Volta was on next. They come on, and after such a long day, we just sort of wished they'd go away. Their music was messy and all over the place, and you couldn't hear the singer. Good stage presence, but I was starting to get a little annoyed. He ended up coming off stage, and jumping up on the barricade. I held his ankle. Tessa held his thigh. Wow.

I just look really confused.

We see Robin and Rob walking around backstage.


After what seemed like one continuous never ending song, it was finally over.


NOW WE WAIT FOR NIN.

They test the screens and it only gets us more excited. Most of us know what songs they're checking for. It makes us cheer. We set up the sign.



A man walks up to Riot. 'Have you been here all day?'
'Yes.'
'Yeah, I saw you first in line, and I've seen you here all day. So I've got a couple backstage passes for you. I don't know if the band will be there, and I only have two, but I just thought you deserved it.'


We are all left completely speechless. Tessa and I look at each other, and get all teary eyed. I ask Riot what she's going to do. She couldn't take just one of us. I told her to take her friend. It would kill Tessa and I if only one of us got to go. Riot asks us if we want her to get something signed. No, that would make us feel even more left out. Plus, what's the point in having something signed, if you didn't ge tit yourself? Okay, we were actually really bummed out. This sucks. We missed our chance once already, and now we have to miss it again.
Why does this always happen?
So close, yet so far away.


We shut the fuck up, and calm down.
Whatever.

Now we're just pissed off, and can't wait to get that anger out.

Next thing I know, Tessa screams.
What the fuck?
'LISTEN' she says.



Then I start screaming.

'999,999'

Then everyone starts screaming.


AHHHHHHHH.
'1,000,000'

I start shaking. I'm never going to be ready for this, am I?


Josh drums away like a mother fucking god. I'm going to miss him. Then Robin, playing like a mad man. I am absolutely in love with the way he plays, and his badassness.

I KNOW WHO'S NEXT. Trent! It's Trent.

I'm not sure this could ever get old. Tessa and I rock the fuck out. We've been so disappointed in the rail people lately. No energy. They just stand there. We want to change that. We go crazy. Surprisingly the crowd wasn't pushing us much at all. Cool. That's nice. We got to dance at a NIN concert. Something we really wanted to do.

I was cameraless this time. I didn't plan on using it in the first place, then I REALLY wasn't able to use it, when the security threw all my stuff on the ground. I freaked out about our flags, they wouldn't give them back to me.

[I find concerts incredibly impossible to describe song by song.
So I'll give you the set list, and go from there.]


999,999
1,000,000
Letting You
Discipline
March Of The Pigs
Head Down
The Frail
Closer
Gave Up
The Warning
The Great Destroyer
5 Ghosts I
25 Ghosts III
19 Ghosts III
Piggy Ghosts
The Greater Good
Pinion
Wish
Terrible Lie
Survivalism
The Big Come Down
31 Ghosts III
Only
The Hand That Feeds
Head Like A Hole

Echoplex
The Good Soldier
Hurt
In This Twilight

Riot's Pictures:

The dancing only lasted till 'March of the Pigs'. Of course. We all know that's when it gets really rowdy.
Dude, we rocked the FUCK OUT. Had the time of our mother fucking lives.





Riot says that Trent and Robin  were looking down and smiling at us a lot during MOTP, because of how crazy we were. Haha, oh no. If that's true, that's embarrassing.


We got to hear some songs we've never heard live before. It was amazing.

Also, got our picture up on nin.com.


I just found out that since Lil'Wayne took so long, Trent had to cut 30 minutes off their show.
Apparently, Vessel, God Given, and THE WRETCHED were cut. I would really love to rip that man's dick off for costing me The Wretched live. I was so looking forward to seeing it.

Eventually, after a fuckload of fake tears to get our flags back, the security guard gave us our flags. Success for Survivalism.

^ Trent showing off. ^
Yeah, Riot has mad skills with the camera.

Okay, I can't go through every detail of the show. Mostly just cause I can't describe what I felt.

After the show, Tessa was still crying from 'Hurt', when the roadie gave her Josh's drumstick. Yay for cleavage! Oh, and tears.


We left Riot, and told her we'd see her in Portland in December. She'd be leaving in the morning to go back home to New York.


We met up with Molly and Carol. They were so blown away by what they had just witnessed. They had no idea it was going to be THAT good. They just couldn't get over it. We talked about it the entire way back. Tess and I did our typical after show ritual. Long shower, big T-shirt, knee high socks, room service, lay in bed, and watch the beginning of a movie.
This time it was Wall-E.
We barely made it through the beginning and just fell asleep.





VOODOO DAY 3-
Exploring NOLA, Meeting Robin.


We'd been really looking forward to sleeping in Sunday morning. But no, housekeeping had to pound on our door at 9 am. After that, we were awake. We had no idea what we were going to do all day. 'Post-nin depression'. Nothing seems like it could live up what you experienced the night before. Everything is simply, boring.


We got dressed with very sore bodies. Mostly our feet and chest from walking around and standing around for 3 days straight with little rest, and being rammed against the rail all night. We were a little bruised.


We headed out for brunch with Molly and Carol. Our first REAL meal in a while. New Orleans has the BEST food in the entire world. It felt like heaven. We walked around for a while after that. Headed over to Magazine Street, because Molly and Carol wanted to see Nothing, and do a little shopping at the stores we'd found that Thursday night.

We made it to Nothing, and got a good look at how broken it really was. Something we could really see at night. The flag was gone. Haha, well duh.

It was actually kind of sad though. That place was so beautiful, and so much went into it, now it's empty [kind of] and broken, and people had graffitied all over it, and hmph. Just depressing.





We started heading back down toward Trent's old house. All the stores were closed because it was Sunday. We were tired, sore, thirsty, and depressed. Just not a good day. We had completely given up on going anywhere else. We were tired and just wanted to go back to the hotel, order room service, and sulk. We were just zoning out while waiting for the light at a stop walk, when I had been staring at this guy on a bike with orange knee high socks and a green and black striped shirt without really meaning to.

I hear Molly say, 'Is that Robin?' and I look around thinking, 'Nahh, I'd know if I saw him. Plus, they're probably on their way to Florida right now.' The guy on the bike passed us, and he looked right at us, and smiled.

WAIT.
WHAT?
WOAH.
ROBIN.
That was HIM?
WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED??


I grab Tessa's arm. We look at each other with wide eyes. I called Riot, and it went straight to voicemail. I needed our NIN mommy to tell us what to do, but she was on a plane. Shit.


Upset that we'd missed them again for the THIRD time that weekend, we continued walking. We talk about how fucking RANDOM that was. ROBIN FINCK just rode past us on a big red bicycle. What the HELL just happened? That doesn't make ANY sense at all.


We stop at a restaurant for something to drink. Completely silent. We lost him. Again. How could we let this happen? [If you don't know us at all, you'll know that Robin Finck is one of our favorite artists. We wanted to meet him more than Trent. So you could see how we'd be heartbroken about missing our chance to meet him.] After a few minutes of silence, Tessa tells Carol that we were going to go walk around. 'Okay', Carol says.


As soon as we get out the door, Tessa says, 'You know what we're doing right?'. 'Oh yeah.' I say. 'We're on a mother fucking mission.' 'I refuse to let this happen again.' she says. We head towards Nothing. The same direction we saw Robin turn before we lost him.

We end up stopping, and just standing around trying to figure out what the fuck to do. AT that point we'd almost given up. Butt then I look over, and what do you know. 'Woah!' I yell like an idiot.
'What!?' Tessa says.
"Robin, no way. Right there.' I say in a kind of whisper.
Without even thinking I call him over.


'Hey Robin! Come here!' He's on the other side of the street, and has no idea where the voice is coming from. 'Over here Robin, come on! Come on!' Tessa and I signal him to come over. He crosses the street and pulls up right in front of us on his big red bicycle.

"What's up guys?' he says while giving us each a high five.
We talk a little before we introduce ourselves.
'I'm Robin' he says.

We talked for a little bit. He told us about how he used to live on Magazine Street. I told him I loved it there and that I could totally see myself living here; it's beautiful. He told us how much he loved it there also. Said he had just gone over to 'nin studios' [Yes, he actually called it 'nin'.] We said we'd just been over there. He tells us 'It's all broken and stuff. The windows are all smashed'.
We talked a bit about Voodoo, he tells us how much he enjoyed playing the festival.

He asks what we were even doing over there. We told him we were just walking around, we loved the area. He asked if we lived around there. He seemed amazed when we told him that we'd come all the way from Portland.
'I think we have a show in Portland,' he told us.
'Yepp,' I said, 'We'll be there too. Right at the rail as usual.'
'Cool, cool.' he says while nodding up and down. 'Me too.'
Tessa asks if we could possibly get a picture. He seemed totally excited to get one.
'Get this sweet bike in it too!' he said.

Tessa and Robin

Robin and Myself

I walked over and he put his his arm across my shoulder and his head on mine.
He smelled really good. Is that creepy to say?

After the pictures, we talked a little more small talk, and we decided we'd let him get back to what he was doing.
'Well. I guess we'll let you go now,' Tessa said.
'Alright, I guess I'll keep cruising then.'

We say goodbye.
'I'm going to cross the street now,' he says.

We laugh and walk away without looking back. We kept walking back toward the restaurant, and Robin passes us again.

He waves and yells, 'See you in Portland!'.

"Have fun!' Tessa yells.











Overall.
It was a pretty incredible fucking weekend.